I Feel a Blog Coming On...

This past Christmas has been absolutely amazing. My friends and family are so good to me! The greatest gift of all was being able to go to Iowa to visit my family out there. I had a blast! I got to spend some good, quality time with all of them. And I really enjoyed being able to spend time with my little brother and sister. They are two amazing kids and I feel fortunate to have them as my sibilings. I can't wait to see all the greatness they'll accomplish when they grow up! We had fun playing in the snow under the moonlight, seeing avatar, playing guitar hero, creating Mii's on the wii, and watching the old Christmas claymation films while acting them out. It was great and very much needed! It helped console me, in a sense. I mean, this may sound kinda crazy and stupid, but just knowing that they do still "exist" relieved me. It was nice seeing their routines and meeting their neighbors. But like all good things, it had to come to an end. I came home this past Saturday and I haven't really had time to accept the fact that I am, indeed, back home and things have to go back to normal. Coming home is always bittersweet. It's so nice to be back in your own surrounds (room, house, etc.), but it sucks that reality has to check in as well. And saying bye (oh, excuse me, I mean "see ya later") to four people is not easy...Especially when you're leaving and going home by yourself. But I sucked it up like a big girl. However, you know what makes it so worthwhile to come home?? How happy everyone is to see you. It's almost as if they never realized what they had until you left. Everyone (coworkers, friends, family, parents at work) has expressed how glad they are that I'm back. That's a nice feeling, to know that I am appreciated and loved. And I mean that with all sincerity. Anyways, that just about wraps it up. Just wanna end this by saying that I appreciate each and every single one of you who read this. I'm so grateful to have you in my life :)

Dear Santa...

Hello, world! It's been quite a while since I've sat down to write a blog. Today seemed like a good day to do so. I don't really have a lot of interesting things to write about, but I just thought I'd take the time to let you all know how my life is going. I've been doing pretty well actually. Been working between 35 - 40 hours a week at Tutor Time still. I took one class this semester and passed it. However, don't know if I'll be able to take any next semester...School means money...something that I lack at the moment. I dunno. It's possible! I can't afford to go back to being part time though. I definitely don't make enough.

Anywho, onto a new subject. I'm super stoked because I've been lucky enough to get some time off to go to Iowa :) It's very exciting! I haven't seen my family since the end of June/beginning of July. I'm in need of some Corbelli time! Nothing but laughter and fun :) I leave the 26th...I'm kinda stressing out though. I literally have NO warm clothes. And I don't have any boots. So if Santa doesn't bring me any, then I think I may have to buy some while I'm there. I don't do well with the cold. I say it all the time, but I really do live in Phoenix for a reason. I do better with the heat! :)

I've been pretty dedicated to the gym the past couple weeks. And I've noticed that my pants are a little bit looser. That makes me happy! All my hard work is paying off. I love pumping some iron ;) Haha.

I can't believe that Christmas is this Friday. Where did this month go to?? I mean, really...Where did it go???? Luckily, I finished ALL of my Christmas shopping yesterday! Phew...I can relax now. All that's left to do is wrap all of 'em...Blah. I'm not diggin that, but it's all part of the Christmas season. I'm really excited about this Christmas :) I'm excited about spending Christmas Eve with my family and being able to go back to my grandma's house. It's going to be great :)

Oh yeah, and did I happen to mention that my sister is pregnant?? Yup. The rumors are true ladies and gents! I'm going to be an auntie...again :D This is her and her husband's first, so it's way exciting for us all! I'm so excited for her. So so so so SO excited! I hope I'll be able to go out to Oregon when the baby is born! That would just be the cherry on top of a fantabulous year :)

Alrighty folks, well this was as random as random gets! I hope you all enjoy your holidays! Thanks for reading. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year :)

Funky Feelings

Lately, I've been in a funk. It's made me extremely irritable and I get upset at the littlest things. After being on vacation, I've come to realize some things. I don't really want the life that I lead. Part of me is wanting to get the hell out of Arizona. I feel as if I need new surroundings, new people. I've been mixed up in all sorts of drama for far too long and it kind of took it's toll on me. It's affected my diet, my mood, my relationships, my job...everything. In turn, it feels like I've slowly managed to slip into depression. Not good. I used to be able to pick myself up after these kind of things, but it's been really hard this time. I fell really hard and I'm unable to do it on my own. I'm in need of assistance and I feel like every time I start to get back up, something comes around to push me right back down again. It's a sad feeling. I feel sort of alone, even though I know I'm not. I have a hard time explaining my feelings and the thoughts going on in my head. Words have never been something I'm good with. I'm better at writing. I'm really missing my family. In both Oregon and Iowa. I thought I was okay, but some days I'm really not. I will be though, and in the end, that's what matters.

Well, that it's for now folks. Just a little blurb to help explain the mood swings. Peace out.

The Song Has Been Sung

And so, my family is officially moving to Iowa on the 19th of June. Yeah...bum deal to the max. I avoid things, including emotions and reality. Just avoid it altogether. Not one of the better qualities that I possess, but it's just something I do. For a while there, I really didn't think this move was going to happen. I was being pretty selfish because I was excited that they didn't have anyone interested in the house. Awful thing to be excited about, I know. But, again, I tend to be a little selfish at times. When they broke the news to me that the house had been sold, it was like I had been hit by a semi-truck. I heard that annoying "screeeeeeeeeeeech" sound inside my head. I wasn't quite sure how I should have reacted to the news. Should I be happy? Sad? Excited? Angry? All of the above??? I honestly don't know how I'm going to react when it happens. The great thing about it is that I have an amazing support system. My friends and family are wonderful and I know they will be there for me until the very end. I may need a lot of shoulders to lean on. This is going to kill part of me for a while, but I will move on and I'll become a stronger person after this. I truly didn't expect to live in the same state as my family for my entire life. I've been spoiled with that. I think what I'm mostly afraid of is that I'm going to miss out on my little brother and sister's lives. Ugh...I don't think anyone could possibly understand how much that tugs at my heart. Tears are welling up in my eyes right now at the very thought of it. I haven't been a huge part of their lives as it is, and now many regrets are surfacing. This too shall pass, this too shall pass. I gotta remember to just keep swimmin', just keep swimmin', and to keep moving forward. Two quotes from Disney movies in the same sentence :) That's how I roll.

Anyways, I dedicate this to my family. I will miss you very much. I'm hanging in there the best that I can. And in a crazy way, I believe that this will just bring us closer rather than push us farther apart. I love you guys. Don't worry, be happy :)

Hello, Bloggers!

It's been a while since I've used this handy dandy blogging site. I kinda forgot about it. And I've been a little busy with school and life. Life has been pretty dramatic for me lately. But it's slowly, but surely, getting back to normal. I haven't been doing that great on my diet. I've put on around 10 pounds over the last 2 months, because of all the stress and drama that has been going on in my life. However, starting tomorrow, I'm officially back on the diet. No cheating whatsoever. And I'm starting a kickboxing class tonight that I'm completely stoked about. I think by doing this, it'll help me lose weight even faster. It's time for me to get phsyical, physical! :) hehe. I'm trying not to stress too much about my weight gain. I've still lost 20 pounds and that's pretty amazing to me. I think that I look trim. And the most important thing is that I'm comfortable in my own skin. This diet has given me more confidence than I could have ever asked for. I'm good with that.

I went to California to visit my "Aunt Kelly" and "Uncle John" :) Haha...We went for Kelly's baby shower. It was a blast, but way too short! You seriously can't spend just 2 days in Cali. You hafta be able to actually spend time there, ya know? It wasn't very relaxing because we were just always going. Constantly...but I had a really good time! I must say though, Kelly and John are one of the only couples that I see who just seem to keep falling even more in love with each other. I admire them for that and I'm completely jealous of what they have, but very glad that they are both truly happy. I love watching them together. They're just so sweet! And they love being in each other's company. And they aren't too mushy about it. It's just...sweet! I know I already said that, but I'm running out of words to say.

Anyways, that's pretty much all I've got to say. I just wanted to check in. I'm not sure if anyone even reads this site anymore, but whatever! I enjoy writing :) Thanks for stopping by!

Hellz Yeah!

Hello my fellow blog readers! Just droppin in to write a quick note. I'm sitting here thinking to myself how worked up we all get over the superbowl. Even I get worked up; me who doesn't pay any attention to football whatsoever during the season. There's something about the superbowl that's exciting. I mean we treat it like it's a national holiday. Most men would probably argue with me on that one and say that it IS a holiday :) It's so amazing how well the Cardinals are doing. I'm not gonna sit here and pretend like I'm a huge Cardinals fan or anything, but I have to support them because they're my home team. It's nice to see them FINALLY doing well! I just don't like how everyone here has jumped on the bandwagon and is all of a sudden huge Cardinals fans. Most people here probably don't know a thing about them. Sad truth. Anyways, that's my sports talk for the day :)

I'm officially back in school and it's going well. It was the right decison and I'm way proud of myself! It's hard going back after being out for a year. I had several people tell me they didn't think I would go back. I started to believe it too. But after being stuck at Tutor Time for so long, I decided that that was no way to live...No way to live at all. What am I doing for a living? Raising kids, training to be a mom and a housewife. No thanks. Not for me. Not yet at least...I mean I'm only 20 years old folks! I need a career. I'm actually enjoying my job now though. Four days out of the week I only work four hours. So I'm able to tolerate it a little bit better. Yeah, it's a big cut in pay, but it's really okay. I don't need to be making a huge amount of money.

Anyways, I think that's really all I need to say for the time being :) I'll try to check in more often. Thanks for reading guys!

Back to School, Back to School...

I'm totally stoked because after being off for a year, I am officially going back to school in a week :) And I actually have a sense of direction this time. I'm going to get my AA in science because I've decided that I am going to go ahead and pursue zoology. There are so many things I would like to do, but I need to stick with one for now. I love animals. I love everything about them and they truly make me my happiest. Haha, yes I know that was corny. But it is so true. So it only makes sense to do something that I love. I'm so excited :) I feel good! And I feel more dedicated than I have in a while. Yay.

I chopped my hair yesterday. Well, I took about 2 inches off. And my layers on top are really short, which I hate but they need to get cut too. The guy told me that if I want my hair to be one length again, I'm going to have to cut it into the angled bob thing, which I contemplated doing it this time but I wasn't ready. However, next time I think I'm going to do it. Ugh...yeah I'm going to. My hair has thinned out so much and it's cause I have all those stupid short layers on the top of my head. Haha, yes I'm really writing about my hair in my blog. We all know how obsessed I am with it :) But I'll end it here.

I went in for my weigh in on Tuesday and I gained 3 pounds. I really wasn't that upset about it though. I was expecting it. I've been slacking way too much. But I'm finally getting back on track. My mom and I started walking again this week, and I'm gonna start doing a thousand crunches (haha not literally) 'cause my mom got me an awesome crunch ball for Christmas :) Last weekend I bought my first new pairs of jeans that are smaller than the size I've been wearing, AND I got rid of several pairs that were too big. Haha that's so exciting! This is going to be a good year. I think this is going to be the year I've been waiting for. I've been waiting for my life to change drastically and I really think this is it!

Anyways, just felt the need to write. I'm way excited about everything and I wanted to share my excitement with ya'll. Thanks for tuning in!